oops the for liz post was supposed to read this

Boom
My head explodes
Your face is coated.
It's strangely erotic

This look, you covered in my gunk.
Fascinating
beautiful young woman
Thoughtful and kind
Covered in me

You were the cause of the head explosion
It's your own fault you're covered in my ick
If only it weren't my big head you'd made burst
"Women exist to serve men"
Ugh

Off the top of the dome (be kind about spelling as I had no spell check and am totally reliant)

Conversations I have with myself and others all the time. In free flow writing poetry edition

Word Vomit
If I don't spew something I might die
I will force these words

Uninspired dribble

Unintelligible, Unrelated

Worst of all unfeeling

Still, they are guided
they are forced to surface
They will not be drowned
their air was almost up.

That's it.
The build up of toxic gases killed it's reason
The nascence of a mush brained poem

I wanted to right this for so long
it would not be written.
It could not be righted.

I can't believe this is the poem I dreamt about. Fuck I'm such a loser.

I'm a liar, but this isn't a lie. I hope
Hi have we met?
My name's Max.
If we've met, I've lied to you

The compulsion propels

A viscous cycle
too sticky to escape

I tried being honest with people
it turned my interactions...

It grated my relationships.
People hated me
Narrator included.

I tried telling you. I'm dull,
I'm nervous,
I'm happiest when I'm alone,

It didn't matter.

you were only happy with me: aggressor.

I made bad jokes,
I spoke brusquely,
I was sexually aggressive with all the wrong girls.

I was emotional.
I was weird.
I was the center of attention.

This is the man I'm known as.
This is part of the man I am

I am my own actions,
I own my reality,

and yet

I am vacant.
I am lost.
I don't have a fucking clue how it ended this way. Why do I insist on making a fool of myself?

Oh yeah the pussy.

Floods and Droughts
Allow me to introduce myself
I am mustache Max
hiding something behind a thin vail
Like a gay man with... well... a mustache.
I am a creator of bad words, and a provocateur of hair brained schemes
I am the impetus behind an entire school of thought.
Maxian: Posturing is victory
Learned in the ways of savage beasts
I spit soap box philosophy Enlightening a minority
I will change your life

Or not

I'm really a self important loser with a big nose

I'm out of shape, and out of my mind

I don't know why people are impressed with me.

NOTICE to readers It's A Sham.

My confidence is so tied to others
not just their liking me,
but their agreance.
Tacit, or other. In my mythology

I am a legend, or I want to kill myself.

I just wish I had a middle speed.

I don't think anyone else does this (all assholes do this)
I am unique.
A precious, precocious snowflake.
No don't look that way,
I'm original.

My jokes? I came up with those
Oh you'd heard it before?

Shit.

Why I use drugs
Because.
They.
Make.
Me.
Cool.
no lie.

Is That Right?
Her smooth skin glistens
a light sheen of sweet sweat upon my lips

The flow from the left foot
to the left hip
along her shapely side

Enticing

Her right side buried
At peace

Her back rhythmically pumping
Up and down
Gentle reminders of her exhaustion

Lucky me.

Witness to sated beauty.

Her body tells me she wants to be held

I just want her to go

Please leave
I've got a lot of work to do tomorrow.
I really need a good nights sleep.

I stay silent.

I move to the couch.

Nice Blind Date is on.

Things I Think While Depressed

I wish I wasn't me,
But I don't want to be anyone else.
How can you appreciate when
The only thing you dislike more than yourself
is everyone else.

Lonesome Thompson Gunner

Warren Zevon
The soundtrack to my travels
my travails
have a much less poignant ambience.

On reading poetry

I'm posting this mostly as a reminder to myself (well only erik actually looks at this site)
1. Read with the grammar not the structure
2. Finish the poem if you can, and if you can't either it's garbage, or you're an idiot
3. They don't have to make sense to touch on reality. So don't dodge the topic because it's a big fucking quagmire.

Lemon(lime)/LSD (poem found written in highschool while tripping)

The acid spews delicious
It's flavor jump from the pallet

Absorbed in paper and citrus
They hue my life
Flavors and realities

One an altered state.
The other alters taste.
The effect is striking,

Only in its similarity.
Cerebral changes emerge,
They are beaten back.

Only to renew its nascence.
So easy to forget,
Tastes and sensations.

This feeling,
Pleasurable, Indescribable.
Is it from a good meal, or the six tabs I swallowed?

On intimacy and other ununderstandables

Intimate moments
The light touches the skin pressed,
the words unleashed...
Spewed un-edited un-filtered full of life

Most of life you live behind a shield
A spiked wall ready to bash.
Turning your friends and family to tikka
Your words unsaid metal skewers bisecting your relationships

These moments of intimacy.
Brief glimpses into my own humanity.
glances into what I think I am.

Isn't it odd.
Strange. Weird. Or at least somewhat unusual.
That all my most intimate moments are with strangers?